Category Archives: farangs

Like Father Like Son 2008

Fenway took a fall in the bathroom. Lots of blood. 8 stitches. No longer perfect. Everyone says his mother beat him. Mam would never touch him. Me maybe, but like father like son. My black eye is from a street fight in Pattaya. “It was a good fight, ma, but I lost.” In fact I […]

TO LIVE AND DIE IN PATTAYA by Peter Nolan Smith

Pattaya isn’t what it used to be in the 90s or 80s. The coconut plantations have been replaced by luxury villas. Interpol and the Thai Police hunt down fugitives and the Russians have taken over the hills, so three summers ago I moved north to Sri Racha with my son Fenway and his mom. The […]

THE END OF RICE by Peter Nolan Smith

Thailand has many superstitions. One concerns rice. Never joke while eating or else a ghost will steal your rice. The ghosts will have to wait, for this is the beginning of the rainy season and throughout the Kingdom aging farmers are planting rice. The current price for jasmine rice per tonne from the wholesalers is […]

Washing Hands a Go-Go

Another New York survey revealed that less than 1% of men at Yankee Stadium washed their hands after using the bathroom. Even scarier was that less than 2% did so after squatting on the porcelain throne. Thankfully more than 20% did so after puking cheap hot dogs and worthless Bud beer. Last month I decided to […]

FOR BETTER OR REALLY WORSE by Peter Nolan Smith

Six Aprils ago Nick and I were drinking beer in Buffalo Bar to celebrate Beermas. It was a holiday for every day of the year. We never go to go-gos, since disco music wasn’t conducive to meaningless conversations. The DJ was spinning an insipid boy band tune, which was the perfect background music for our […]