Category Archives: farangs

Happy Sabaii Sabaii Happy by Peter Nolan Smith

In 1972 Bhutan’s King Jigme Singye Wangchuck attempted to reform his country’s feudal economy on a Buddhist spiritual level rather than a capitalistic model. To best judge his efforts the king created a Gross Domestic Happiness Index based on life satisfaction, life expectancy at birth, and ecological footprint per capita. The Happy Planet Index placed […]

FOR BETTER OR REALLY WORSE by Peter Nolan Smith

Six Aprils ago Nick and I were drinking beer in Buffalo Bar to celebrate Beermas. It was a holiday for every day of the year. We never go to go-gos, since disco music wasn’t conducive to meaningless conversations. The DJ was spinning an insipid boy band tune, which was the perfect background music for our […]

Thai Fatale

Some stupid motherfuckers at ONION thought it was hilarious to sell a tee-shirt silkscreened with the logo I WENT TO THAILAND AND ONLY GOT A STUPID WHORE. I liked ONION before this, but now they’re only worthy of the devil’s piss if they’re on fire. Like what’s wrong with whores and they are the most […]

Moe-Ho Road Rage ala Thai

This Thai expression is rarely used while behind the wheel. On Boxing Day 2005 a neighbor roared down my soi in his pick-up. He nearly hit my daughter. My wife later said he didn’t come close, but I took off after him on my motorcycle to give him a piece of my mind. At the […]

TO LIVE AND DIE IN PATTAYA by Peter Nolan Smith

Pattaya isn’t what it used to be in the 90s or 80s. The coconut plantations have been replaced by luxury villas. Interpol and the Thai Police hunt down fugitives and the Russians have taken over the hills, so three summers ago I moved north to Sri Racha with my son Fenway and his mom. The […]