Monthly Archives: December 2009

Panic Code Red 2009

Ex-VP Dick Cheney has accused Barack Obama of “trying to pretend we are not at war” in the face of a Nigerian’s attempted downing of the Northwest Airlines flight. The president interrupted his Hawaiian vacation to state that a “potential catastrophic breach” of security led to the Christmas Day incident. The $40 billion spent on […]

Another Goodbye Maybe Forever

2000 was the start of a new millennium. My plans for the future were short-term, so I had a good feeling for the next decade. MTV threw a New Year’s Eve bash in Times Square. I can’t recall where I was in New York. Most certainly drugs and drink were involved in the evening’s festivities, […]

Goodbye Goodbye compiled a list of previously vital items gone obsolete during this decade. Pay phones, VCRs, fax machines, dictionaries, encyclopedias, yellow pages, classified ads, CDs, floppy discs, bills in the mail, paper, records stores, landline phones, movie rental stores, camera film, dial-up modems, and palm pilots have been dodo-birded by the technological advances of the […]

Brooklyn Tony ON ENGLISH

Brooklyn Tony goes to school, and the teacher says, “Today we are going to learn multi-syllable words, class. Does anybody have an example of a multi-syllable word?” Brooklyn Tony says “Mas-tur-bate.” Miss Rogers smiles and says, “Wow, Brooklyn Tony, that’s a mouthful.” Brooklyn Tony says, “No, Miss Rogers, you’re thinking of a blowjob.” For a […]

Goat-Roping Arena Available

The good citizens of Bozeman, Montana were outraged by the news that their councilmen has approved a plan to spend $50,000 on tennis courts according the the Drudge report. “We’re heading towards 12 TRILLION in DEBT and Barack Obama spends tens of thousands of dollars on tennis courts?” – entry to the Bozeman Daily Chronicle […]