Pattaya Beach Ratings Gay Beach / Jomtien

There are actually two Jomtien Beaches. The better known is the thin strand of sand bordered by the Jomtien Road running south from the police box for several kilometers, however another Jomtien Beach exists north of the police box. No jet skis or rumbling buses, since cars and motorcycles are banned from 8am to 6pm thus bestowing a tropical calm unknown to its Quasimodo cousin. The wind through the wispy pines is rivaled only by the laughter of the beach-goers and you have to ask yourself, why is this beach like this?


Only one explanation.

Quite a few men wear bikini briefs to take the sun. They are thinner than their Pattaya counterparts. Few have beer bellies. None are interested in go-go girls. Sure, they play for the other team, but the beach isn’t 100% gay. Maybe in a certain section, otherwise this beach is for everyone; tourists, families, straights, and gay, but not f—ing jetskis.

Why is it so nice?

Because it’s gay.

The water quality is a 1000 times better than the other Jomtien Beach. The food is fresher too. The beer is a little more pricey, but you can read a book without any hassles for a massage, tattoo or ice cream.

Night and day is the difference and few farang beer buddhas bothered coming to this beach.

They don’t like walking.

Here’s my rating for Gay Beach / Jomtien.

Beach rating (0-5) for each category

Cleanliness – 4.5

The vendors pride themselves in sweeping the plastic off the beach.

Water Quality – 3

The water is much better because there’s no boats or jetskis spewing gas exhaust on the surface. It’s not Koh Lann clear, but swimmable throughout the year and you can actually see fish in the water.

Safety – 5

The jetski operators must curse the buoylines preventing them from endangering the swimmers. Boaters don’t bother cruising this beach either. No life guards but the water is calm most of the year.

Beer and babe access – 5

Beer is available from the beach chair vendors.

Girls? you don’t come with a girl. You don’t get a girl, but it’s nice to be away from a girl sometimes. And the gays don’t hit on you, because they aren’t into chubbies.

Food is okay and in some cases excellent depending on where you sit.

Total score = 17.5

So far the best beach in Pattaya.

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