<

p>On a flight back to the States in 2008 the China Airlines’ 747 stopped in Anchorage, Alaska. Two middle-aged men stood in line for passport control. They were wearing shorts and smiles. The older returnee from Paradise, an overweight teamster, said, “That was the best vacation of my life. I don’t want it to end until I hit work on the North Slope.”

“You’re not going to wear warmer clothes until then,” I asked viewing the snow piled atop the rugged mountains surrounding Anchorage.

“Nope and I’m thinking of going back to retire to Thailand too.”

“Great.”

Thousands of first-timers share the same idea and I ran down the basic Rules of Engagement for a farang in Thailand. He had been warned and like most western men he’ll ignore it, because no love-starved man is smarter than 23 year-old go-go girl.

“Thanks for the information, but my tee-lat is my dream.”

He trundled through immigration with a song in his heart.

As the old song goes “One night in Bangkok can make a strong man stumble.”

His family will regard his plans as folly as did one man’s son according to America Today. His father was a successful businessman, but at 60 unable to find any US woman willing to date him. Enter a Thai dating website and the father jets to Phuket to meet the 23 year-old masseuse of his dreams. His son is dismayed by his father’s naiveté, but then realized after a long-distance phone conversation. “Well, what in the hell is the alternative? An abysmal life leading to death? Or you just keep trying with… very mixed success sometimes.”

“So, how much longer do you have over there?” The son ask him.

“’till I go home, if ever,” he says. “I might just pay somebody to pack me up and sell my stuff.”

Another man bitten by the Thailand bug.

Few are strong when faced by a life without women in the West. It’s not the sex they miss it’s the love for love is always easier to fake than an orgasm.

ps Anchorage was cold.

The North Slope was colder.

Shorts don’t work above the Arctic Circle.

And neither do Thai go-go girls.