Art Basel Crushed Car

Every December the at world descends on the Miami Beach Convention Center to kick off the winter season in Florida. Tens of thousands of art enthusiasts throng through the gallery exhibitions during the day and pack the restaurants and bars at night. Prices are 50% above retail, so the entire event is dominated by the need to be seen rather than look at the countless paintings, sculptures, and installations of Art Basel.

I have been invited to attend and always refused, since I consider Art Basel as somewhere to avoid and be seen avoiding the people there, especially since Sophie Marceau would never go there.

Only monsters from New York.

And rat-thin vamps from Miami modeling agencies.

But there are some stars in the purgatory of Art Basel and according to the art media Jimmie Durham scored a hit with Still Life with Xitle and Spirit, which featured a Chrystler Spring crushed by a gigantic volcanic basalt rock.

“I like it, but I don’t know where I’d put it,”I told my friend, who had sent a photo of the sculpture The piece had to weigh three or four tons and would take up all the space in my apartment.

“On your lawn in Thailand.”

I have no lawn there. Only rice fields stretching into the hills.

Plus bad things happen to cars all the time.

Like this near-miss.

Or this successful strike.

It’s all a question of luck or an empty road in the flatlands.

Almost like all the cars in the world died and left everyone in peace.

I’d miss the muscle cars.

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