Colder Than A Witch’s Tit

The expression ‘Colder Than A Witches Teat’ is popularly thought to have derived from the witch trials of the Dark Ages (410AD-1964AD). The inquisitors searched the accused females naked body for signs of the Devil; extra teats, nipples, pimples, scars et al. Witches, mostly midwives, were considered heartless by radical Christians and heartlessness meant no blood in their veins. no warmth spread throughout the wicked bodies, hence the colder than a witches teat, however a true explanation from Dancingspirit9 is that during the Age of Sail cannonballs were stacked on warships in a pyramid built on a brass plate with holes cut in to hold the cannonballs from rolling off as the ship listed, rolled and pitched.

The sailors called the plate a brass bra.

Because brass expands and contracts with temperature at a greater rate than iron, rare extreme cold on the cannon deck would cause the brass plate to shrink to the point that the cannonballs would be released from the pyramid and roll over the deck.

“Colder than a witch’s tit in a brass bra” is a saying that evolved from that phenomenon.

It’s 32 and snowing in New York, but this evening the temperature all along the Eastern Seaboard will drop below zero.

With the wind the chill could be a low as -11 Fahrenheit.

It’s Valentine’s Day.

Lovers stay warm and those couples on the outs hold each other tight.

Tonight will be a cold one.

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