MangoZeen

Two years ago Osama Bin laden escaped from a White House detention cell. Neither the FBI, CIA, NSA, or Boy Scouts have a clue as to his whereabouts. Several talent agencies interest in booking the terrorists on Oprah and BBC’s Hardline have also failed to find the Saudi warlord as will as a dozen credit card companies seeking payment for […]

May 17
26 Pacific Rim nations participated in a tsunami-warning drill to test response.
SMS signals were sent to telephones on the Eastern Seaboard. “Run to high ground.”

The message came 5 minutes late, which was better than the last test, which was postponed four hours for a high political official (Not Miss Thailand 2006) to tell the people […]

Thailand is about 27 hours away from the United States. Most Americans only have two weeks holiday a year. Few friends or family came to visit in the Orient and I took the bus up to meet my cousin. Bish was surprised to see me at Don Muang Airport. “You didn’t have to come all […]

Outside the Pattaya Tai Big C Shopping Center there’s a skateboard club. Some Thai kids trying out tricks. Some were good. I tried a few moves and was surprised that I could do a wheelie. Hadn’t really intended to be so acrobatic. A question of putting too much weight on the back foot. The kids applauded […]

In 8 days I’m flying from Bangkok to JFK. 17 hours. My first time back in 3 years. I’m leaving the Land of smiles, my wife, daughter, cheap beer, palm trees, beaches, go-gos, elephants, and my motorcycle.

I don’t think about my car much since my wife drive it.
My friend Nick recently returned from the UK and […]

Four Christian groups have joined the worldwide uproar about the depiction of Jesus, the church, Albinos, Mary Magdalene, and divinity in the soon-to-be released THE DA VINCI CODE. Christians are in the minority in Thailand. If they were an animal, they might even be under danger of extinction, yet these Christians are calling for a national boycott […]

I’ve lived in several foreign countries.
France, Mexico, Indonesia, and Thailand.
You can usually find someone to speak English albeit their version of the language and in order to be understood you dumbize your speech. After a few months you end up sounding like ET after drinking too many beers. “Me want go home.”
Thais tend to mutilate […]

GW Bush has been under a lot of pressure lately. NSA wire taps. Trying to figure out why Iraq is spelled with a Q instead of an N. At a cabinet meeting he was heard to ask Condalezza Rice. “Does it mean they’re queer or sand niggers?”
It was the fifteenth time he had asked the […]

Gold has been the staple gift for Thai girls from their farang boyfriends since the Vietnam War. 5 baht of gold on a bar girl’s neck or wrist is a dead give-away she has a love-struck sponsor in the closet. The girls love this show of wealth, for the sheer pleasure of rendering other bargirls green […]

EMAIL from Friend April 4 after I invited him to join me on a trip to Phnom Penh to avoid Songkran
His reply
No thanx, I’m driving 2 Nana Plaza dancers to Isaan for Songkran. At least
something will get wet.
Be careful in P-P. Ask permission before you soak one of those little
motherfuckers. They’ve got no sense of […]