Departure from Thailand

In less than 12 hours I’ll be leaving Thailand for the first time in 2 years.

Destination America.

Landing at JFK after a 17-hour flight on Thai Air. Direct. No stops in Tokyo to decreasL805.jpge the culture shock. One day I’m in Thailand; palm trees, elephants, and beaches. The next New York; skyscrapers, fat people, and concrete.

Of course aside from having to listen to political blather mixed with religion from obese males seeking a hair weave for cheap, I suspect the most difficult transition will be driving according to western standards.

Every day in Thailand I amass about $1000 in USA traffic violations on my motor scooter. I burn red lights and go down one-way streets without any thought to being caught by the local gendarmerie, since the greatest fine is around 400 baht. More if you are driving a car. After two years my financial savings has been about $600,000.

Thankfully I’m not going to the UK where the eye in the sky record all vehicular misdeeds. 1 MPH over the limit and it’s 100 quid.

At least in the States there’s some leeway. 10 MPH.

Do I have to drive on the right side of the road like everyone else?

What about the driving down the breakdown lane one way to get to your exit?

Will NY State troopers be as forgiving as those in the land of Smiles?

I doubt it, since the West in the Land of NO.

NO this and NO that.

Two go-go dancers on the back of my bike at 2am.


None of us with helmets.


After drinking five tequilas.


See what I mean.

It’ll be okay. I’ll survive and It’s only for a month.

A very long month.